I think a lot about discrimination and hate, and the violence and hurt that often result from it. Being a gay man, I have been victim of several acts of hate, some more serious than others. I was reminded TODAY of just how much it hurts when I was simply washing my hands in a restroom at the university I work at, and someone passed behind me and did the “faggot” cough as he walked into a toilet stall. It frustrates and angers me to have to endure this, but it makes me think about people who are harrased far more frequently than myself.

I believe that  the Transgender community is the most harrased, discriminated against, and victimized group of people in our society. A great deal of this discrimination comes from the community that claims to be most accepting of our “T” friends – the lesbian, gay, bisexual community. I have had dozens of gay friends who have gawked at transgender people they have seen dining in restaurants, saying things like “they should pick a gender”. I have seen a transgender woman shoved and violenty hit in a gay bar for coming onto a gay man. And most frequently, I hear my gay friends throw around the term “HTM: Hot Tranny Mess” on Facebook and in conversation, commenting on each other’s photos or how “torn up” they were last night. We get mad when people say “That’s So Gay!”, so why is it ok to use “Tranny” as a way to describe something we don’t like? Let’s go back to just saying “FML”.

Beyond this, transgender individuals continue to be murdered by hate violence. Hundreds of people have been killed over the years, and the violence continues. The Transgender Day of Remembrance was created to  commemorate the 1998 murder of Rita Hester. The 8th Annual San Diego Transgender Day of Remembrance will be held this Friday, November 20 with a candlelit vigil starting at The Center. A program will follow.

I encourage you to stand in solidarity with our transgender friends this Friday and say NO to all forms of hate and violence, and most importantly, remember those whose lives were lost far too soon.